Shauna DeWitty

Constant seeker of knowledge, music and film aficionado, true crime enthusiast & self-crowned Queen of Binge Watching.

Hardly anyone likes having difficult conversations in any setting, and it may feel even more uncomfortable having one at your place of work. Whether it may be with a coworker, a client or even your supervisor, having difficult conversations are unfortunately sometimes necessary. The good news is that the majority of the time having the first difficult conversation can result in a positive outcome.

For example, a supervisor needs to speak with an employee about their sub-par performance. If this is the first conversation they need to have, albeit difficult, the take away is that something positive should be the end result— improved performance. A positive result should be the outcome of majority, dare I say, all, difficult conversations.

The reasoning behind sitting down with someone and having to voice your dissatisfaction is with the intention that the receiver of the message will alter their behaviors or attitudes that is causing the tension, therefore, resulting in a positive conclusion. You are actually doing a disservice to you and your subordinates if you ignore the opportunity to have these uncomfortable chats. The behavior will never change because it has never been addressed. Now, imagine you’re the receiver of this unpleasant encounter. No one likes to hear that they’re not meeting expectations, but try to see this conversation as constructive, not combative. The relator of this message is trying (hopefully) to help you improve and make the required changes to ensure you succeed in your position. Look on the bright side: the supervisor is giving you feedback on how to excel at your work; they aren’t firing you. Understand that they are assisting you by having this unpleasant meeting, instead of avoiding it and letting the problem fester until they release you of your duties.

The most uncomfortable conversation for both parties is probably the relieving-you-of-your-position conversation, or what it’s referred to in many retail settings, “being promoted to customer”. Like I said in the beginning, all difficult conversations do have positive outcomes, and I think being fired is no exception. Sure, feelings are hurt and maybe some choice words are said, but this action is most likely for the best. If you are being let go, chances are, you may not have been performing to the organization’s standards. Maybe it was too much, not enough or whatever the case, just not the right fit. The same goes to the person executing the firing. It’s very uncomfortable to let someone go, but again, chances are, they weren’t meeting expectations of the position and you need someone on your team who will. The employee and employer need to think like Goldilocks, sans breaking and entering, and search for the right fit concluding in a positive result.

Having open and honest communication among your team and organization are vital to making your team work more cohesively due to the trust and respect in the group. Having difficult conversations are equally important because it signals to everyone in a team that their contribution is significant and out of regard for that person, even the hard conversations need to be made. The ultimate goal for the organization is to thrive and having support, even in difficult situations, is going to make an infinite difference in the relationships of the team.